Beyond the Gate: How to Stop Tripping Over Your Own Mind
Let’s be honest—most of us don’t realize how much we get in our own way. We set goals, make plans, maybe even buy a fancy planner, and then… nothing changes. We hesitate, we overthink, we stay stuck in the same cycles.
It’s like standing in front of a gate, staring at everything we want on the other side, convinced it’s locked. We tell ourselves we’re not ready, not good enough, or not capable. But what if the gate was never locked in the first place?
This is where metacognition comes in.
What Is Metacognition (and Why Should You Care)?
Metacognition is just a fancy way of saying "thinking about your thinking." It’s like having an out-of-body experience—but instead of watching yourself in a fight scene in an action movie, you’re just watching yourself spiral over whether or not to send an email.
Your brain: "You should probably overanalyze that weird thing you said three years ago."
You (using metacognition): "Or… I could not."
It’s the difference between running on autopilot and actually deciding how you want to think, react, and live.
If you’ve ever caught yourself wondering:
"Why do I always react this way?"
"Why can’t I break this habit?"
"What’s stopping me from moving forward?"
Congrats, you’ve already engaged in metacognition—but now it’s time to use it on purpose.
Why We Stay Stuck
Most of our limitations are learned, which means—good news!—they can be unlearned. But first, you have to recognize a few things:
Your thoughts are not facts. Just because you believe something doesn’t make it true. Example: "I’m bad at public speaking." Okay, but based on what? One awkward moment in 2015?"
Your patterns are not permanent. The way you’ve always done things doesn’t have to be the way you always will. Example: "I always procrastinate." That might be a habit, but it’s not your personality.
You have more control than you think. Once you start recognizing your thinking patterns, you can challenge and rewire them.
So if the gate was never locked, why does it feel like you can’t move forward?
How to Stop Holding Yourself Back
The good news? You can start using metacognition right now.
Step 1: Notice the Gate
What’s actually stopping you? Name it. Get real. Example: "I don’t apply for promotions because I’m afraid of failing."
Step 2: Question the Pattern
Where did this belief come from? Is it actually true? Have you ever challenged it?
Example: "I assume I’d fail at leadership. But haven’t I already led projects successfully before?"
Step 3: Do Something Different
Choose a new response instead of defaulting to old habits.
Example: Instead of thinking "I’ll never be ready for a leadership role," try "I don’t have every skill yet, but I can learn and adapt."
The Bottom Line
Metacognition isn’t about overthinking—it’s about learning how to think differently. It’s about recognizing when you’re holding the key to your own progress and finally having the courage to turn it.
So if you’re standing at a gate, wondering why it won’t open, maybe it’s time to stop assuming it’s locked. Maybe it’s time to push.
What’s on the other side? Only one way to find out.
Book a Session Here →